Adrian Rogers once said this about marriage, “…that many looked for the ideal, ended up in an ordeal and now they are looking for a new deal.” Ephesians Chapter 5 gives the types of love a husband should have for his wife. It uses the example of Christ, the bridegroom and the love He has for the church, the bride.

When Christ sacrificed Himself for the church, He gave Himself on our behalf. The husband’s love for his wife would not be based on what she can do for him, but what he can do for her. His sacrificial love is to set aside his needs, wants, ego, etc. to serve her.

Christ sanctifies and cleanses the church by washing away our sins to make us perfect. Each day, He will forgive us and cleanse us from unrighteousness, to present us, the bride, holy and blameless to the Father.

A husband’s purifying love is to protect his wife from anything that will lead her into sin.

The husband is to teach his wife about the Lord by instruction and example and to develop her holiness, virtue and purity before God and humanity.

The Lord also …nourisheth and cherisheth… the church. The word nourish means to feed and is used to bring along children to maturity. Cherish means to soften with warmth. Christ gives tenderness, comfort and nourishment to provide for our needs.

A husband’s caring love for his wife is to submit himself to her needs. She gives and gives and he, through compassion, sympathy and understanding, is to replenish her mind, body and soul.

When the husband has a caring love for his wife, he is the one who receives the greatest benefit.

“A man is to leave his father and mother…” which means to separate from your parents resulting in a total union with your wife. Next, the man is to join unto his wife, meaning to glue together and form something new.

A husband’s unbreakable love for his wife seeks to make the marriage work by becoming one physically, emotionally and spiritually.

You must be willing to change yourself if you want to see her change. Win your wife over by who you are not by what you buy her.

You can make your marriage work by working at your marriage.

Steve Conwell, pastor of Maranatha Baptist Church, is heard mornings on WFLO and WVHL in “A Thought For Today.” His email address is SteveConwell@outlook.com.